women share 9 tips for how to give them an orgasm

every woman is different, so what one woman loves in bed another woman might loathe. That said, there are a few moves that do tend to work

When you’re close to orgasm, there’s nothing worse than a ringing phone or a crying kid in the next room or an awkward sex position abruptly ruining the moment.

Suddenly sliding away from that peak is disappointing, to say the least. That’s doubly true for women, many of whom find it much harder to achieve orgasm during penetrative sex.

In fact, according to a recent survey, only 65 percent of heterosexual women consistently reach the pinnacle of pleasure during sex.

So what can you do to help her reach that peak? Help her relax, says sex therapist Ian Kerner, Ph.D. “Studies show that in order for a woman to achieve orgasm, the part of her brain associated with stress, emotion, and anxiety has to shut down,” he says. Translation: if you make a woman feel so good that she completely forgets about everything else, then you’re highly likely to give her an orgasm.

Of course, every woman is different, so what one woman loves in bed another woman might loathe. That said, there are a few moves that do tend to work — so if your partner is having trouble getting to the finish line, try these tips from real women and sexual health experts.

1) Get to know the clitoris.

First things first: the vast majority of women require clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm, period. In fact, a study of more than 1,000 women in 2017 revealed that only 18 percent of ladies can orgasm through vaginal intercourse alone. So when you’re having sex, you want to spend as much time stimulating her clitoris as possible.

Some sex positions make it easier to do this than others. Rachel* reveals this trick: “When a guy is on top of you in the missionary position, have him shift his body slightly forward so that, every time he thrusts, his penis rubs against your clitoris.” This tactic is even more orgasmic if the woman’s legs are together and the man’s are straddling her, says Ellen Friedrichs, M.A., an adjunct professor of human sexuality at Rutgers University. You can achieve the same effect when she’s on top by propping yourself up on your elbows, which places your abdomen in closer contact with her clitoris.

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