A fresh conversation has erupted across Nigeria’s online space, one that bridges the pulpit, social media, and the painful realities of womanhood. It began with a short clip from a sermon by Apostle Femi Lazarus, lead pastor of Sphere of Light Church, where he urged women not to use menstrual pain as an excuse for “bad behavior.”
What might have been intended as an admonition on emotional control quickly became the spark for a nationwide conversation after content creator Ruth Aderonke Adepoju aka Omooba publicly responded with a deeply personal video.
The Sermon that Sparked It
In the viral clip, Apostle Lazarus was seen addressing his congregation passionately. He cited Biblical examples of women like Esther who also got their periods, yet didn’t let it cloud their good character.
He cautioned women who use their menstruation to excuse mood swings and bad behavior, stating that such women are simply not peaceful people
The pastor’s tone was about self-discipline and managing emotions but to many women who have lived through the crippling pain of menstrual cycles, the phrasing landed as dismissive.
The debate ignited almost immediately. Some defended the cleric, arguing that his message was about emotional maturity, not about invalidating pain. Others, especially women online, felt he had trivialized a biological struggle he knew nothing about, one that deserves empathy, not moral correction.
Ruth Adepoju: A Pain That Spoke Volumes
Ruth Adepoju was one of those who couldn’t stay silent. Known for her lifestyle content, she posted a heartfelt video on Instagram that instantly went viral. Speaking calmly yet emotionally, she began:
“I recently came across an excerpt of a sermon by Apostle Femi Lazarus… one where he spoke about not using menstrual pain as an excuse for bad behavior.
Now, I understand his intention, the context of his message. It was reminding us to manage our emotions. But as I watched that clip I couldn’t help but be triggered. Not because he meant harm, but because his words echoed a larger misunderstanding that women have long lived with.
You know menstrual pain is not an excuse, it’s a reality. Quite a number of men believe we exaggerate our pain, that we’re being overly dramatic. But let me make this personal: just this month I was admitted to the hospital and I was put on drip because of my period. I had lost so much fluid from vomiting.”
She went on to describe, in painful detail, her monthly ordeal, adding photos of herself on drip to buttress her point. She continued:
“Even after taking diclofenac injection and paracetamol injection, I was still vomiting.
So every month I find myself back in that same hospital battling excruciating back pain, leg pain, muscle spasms, and vomiting. Although it hasn’t stopped me from delivering solid content to you, I barely speak to anyone during this period. All my energy goes into surviving those days. So for three days straight, I take hot pap because anything else, even water, triggers my nausea.
For the past two years, I’ve taken injections every single month. I’ve missed events. I’ve seen six different doctors this year. So when I hear anyone imply menstrual pain is something you simply push through, I feel compelled to speak. Like no… of course we don’t need pity, we need understanding. We don’t need judgment, we need grace.”
By the time she finished, Ruth had struck a chord that transcended gender and faith lines.
The Internet Reacts
Almost instantly, Ruth’s reel was reshared across Instagram and X (formerly Twitter), gathering thousands of comments. Women poured into the comments with their own stories of menstrual pain, endometriosis, and PCOS. Many thanked Ruth for “saying what so many couldn’t put into words.”
Men, too, entered the conversation, some admitted they had underestimated how severe menstrual pain could be. Others defended Apostle Lazarus, emphasizing that the pastor had been misinterpreted and that he never meant to dismiss genuine suffering.
Faith, Femininity, and the Weight of Words
Ruth’s response highlighted an ongoing tension on how some men address topics tied to women’s bodies. Her story was not merely a rebuttal to a sermon, but a testament to what countless women endure in silence each month.
In a society where topics like menstruation are often cloaked in shame or spiritualized, Ruth’s candid tone felt like both confession and confrontation. She didn’t attack the preacher, she contextualized his words. Her message was simply about how women are not asking for excuses, but are asking to be believed.
Her call to action was:
“If someone you love seems withdrawn or irritable during that time of the month, please pause before labeling her as being difficult. You might just be witnessing a silent battle.
And for schools and educators, this should be taught. Girls and boys alike deserve to learn about menstrual health, endometriosis, PCOS, and primary dysmenorrhea. For knowledge breeds empathy, and empathy builds a better society.”
Conclusion
What began as a sermon clip has evolved into a mirror to society’s empathy gap. Apostle Femi Lazarus’ message, however well-intentioned, has reopened the conversation on how people talk about women’s pain from positions of influence. And Ruth Adepoju, with her measured honesty and firsthand account, has helped reframe it from criticism to education