What began as one of the warmest friendships on The Real Housewives of Lagos Season 3 has now turned into a public exchange of accusations, old grievances and receipts.
Adeola “Diiadem” Adeyemi and Dabota Lawson were introduced to viewers in January 2025 as two new housewives whose friendship quickly became one of the brighter spots of the season. Their bond appeared genuine, with the two women defending, supporting and moving closely with each other even as tensions rose among the other cast members.
More than a year later, however, the friendship has collapsed in spectacular fashion.
What started with Diiadem addressing what she described as a “hate train” and smear campaign has turned into a series of accusations involving money, business opportunities, Churchill, bloggers, former partners, other friends and claims of betrayal.
And while their latest clash may appear to have erupted suddenly, the messages now being shared by both women suggest that the friendship had been breaking down for some time.
How It Started: Two RHOLagos Stars Become Close
When Season 3 of The Real Housewives of Lagos premiered in January 2025, Diiadem and Dabota were among the new faces joining the show.
Their friendship seemed almost immediate. At Laura Ikeji’s event in the first episode, the two women clicked, exchanged banter and quickly became close. Showmax described their connection as one of the highlights of the premiere. As the season progressed, Diiadem was often seen standing firmly with Dabota.
That closeness also attracted attention. During the season, Carolyna Hutchings accused Diiadem of constantly siding with Dabota and later described her as a “Voltron for Dabota.”
For viewers, therefore, Diiadem and Dabota were not simply two women who happened to appear on the same reality show. They appeared to have formed a friendship that continued beyond the cameras. But according to the women themselves, cracks were already appearing behind the scenes.
The Friendship Had Already Broken Down Several Times
The biggest revelation from their current fight is that this was apparently not their first fallout.
Diiadem says she had already cut Dabota off several times. At one point in the latest exchange, she corrected Dabota’s account of their previous disagreements, writing:
“This was the 3rd time I cut you off!!! But we won’t visit that today.”
She had also previously said she had asked Dabota to stay away from her twice in the preceding two years.
One of the earlier breaks centred on a man identified in their messages as Bimbo. In a message Diiadem shared, she explained that she was ending the friendship because she felt repeatedly disrespected and unheard. She said she had introduced Dabota to Bimbo but had also told Diiadem how deeply he had hurt her and that she wanted nothing to do with him. According to Diiadem, however, Dabota continued to entertain him.
She recalled an occasion when he came to their table and made her uncomfortable. When she complained, she said Diiadem’s response was essentially that she should be happy he came to say hello. She also mentioned another disagreement involving Lilian and an incident at TM’s thanksgiving, where she said Madam Moji made a disrespectful comment about her in front of other people.
Diiadem said she immediately told Dabota how hurt she was but felt that Dabota again made excuses for the other person. For her, the bigger problem was not one isolated incident. It was the feeling that her emotions did not matter in the friendship. She asked:
“At this point, I have to ask myself if I’m ever allowed to express how I feel in this friendship, or if it only matters when it’s about you.”
Dabota’s response was different. She said she was not deliberately dismissing Diiadem’s feelings. Rather, she believed she was trying to calm her down because Diiadem could become extremely angry and make decisions she might later reconsider. She described Diiadem’s anger as being like “fire” and said she sometimes deliberately avoided getting emotionally involved in Diiadem’s conflicts because she feared encouraging her anger would cause her to “burn so many bridges.”
Still, Dabota apologised. She said she would block Bimbo and insisted that he was not someone she would choose over Diiadem.
For a while, the friendship survived. But it did not last.
The “Lagos Friendships” Comment
Another disagreement emerged after an encounter involving influencer Jarvis at Diiadem’s home.
Diiadem says she made a comment about not doing “Lagos friendships,” after which Dabota sent her a long message. Dabota complained about something different: what she believed was Diiadem’s failure to publicly acknowledge her as a friend.
She said that when Diiadem was asked about her friends in interviews, she sometimes mentioned one or two people while leaving her out. She also said she noticed that Diiadem did not post her birthday speech during a birthday recap. Dabota insisted she noticed such things but normally chose not to react. She wrote:
“I notice things. I simply choose not to react to them unless they become impossible to ignore.”
She also said she had heard things about the friendship from people including Mama, Cynthia and Bimbo but had deliberately kept quiet.
The situation became more painful when Dabota said she had heard that Diiadem begged Mama not to work with her.
Diiadem denied that. She explained that she and Dabota were not in a good place at the time and that when Mama asked her about Dabota, she simply said she could not vouch for her and advised Mama to make her own decision.
She added that if she really wanted to stop Dabota from getting opportunities, she would not have introduced her to people or helped make her relevant in certain circles.
Eventually, Diiadem said, she became tired of the arguments and gossip and cut Dabota off again.
Then Came Churchill
The latest public fight brought a much bigger name into the story: Churchill, the businessman and former husband of actress Tonto Dikeh.
Dabota accused Diiadem of bringing her own private relationship into the public space. According to Dabota, Diiadem travelled to Abuja and, within hours, was openly displaying her relationship with Churchill and engaging in PDA at a nightclub. Dabota also claimed that Diiadem asked to join her on a Bali trip with Churchill. She went further, saying:
“Concerning Churchill, babe, you brought your own business into the public domain. You went to Abuja, and within a matter of hours you were publicly displaying your relationship and engaging in PDA in a night club. Was I there ??? You even begged me to allow you both to come on my Bali trip.
My dear, I processed both your visas yours and Churchill’s for Bali. I have the visa evidence with me.”
Diiadem did not deny knowing Churchill. Instead, she challenged Dabota’s version of how the relationship came about. She claimed Dabota had previously tried to introduce her to Churchill but that she told Dabota:
“I know him.”
Diiadem also alleged that Churchill had rejected Dabota’s friend, Ehi Ogbebor, and accused Dabota of spending considerable time trying to make a relationship between the two happen.
She further claimed that Dabota had spoken badly about Tonto Dikeh, called her names and even warned Diiadem not to greet Tonto when she got to Abuja. Diiadem said she ignored that instruction.
“I got there and did exactly the opposite, and once again, you were upset,” she wrote.
Dabota, meanwhile, said that when Diiadem attended Churchill’s son’s birthday, she repeatedly warned her that if she was romantically involved with Churchill, there was no point pretending to be friends with his ex-wife.
The ₦5 Million Birthday Dispute
Money soon became another major part of the fight. Diiadem posted a bank transaction showing that Dabota transferred ₦5 million to her account on January 12, 2026. The transaction narration appeared to read “Happy birthday in advance.”
Diiadem said that after the money was sent, she was told it was “girls game” and should be returned. She then posted evidence showing that she transferred the ₦5 million back to Dabota that same day.
Dabota offered a different account of their financial relationship. She said she spent well over ₦5 million spraying Diiadem at her birthday, brought other people who also sprayed her and even made souvenirs for the party. Diiadem fired back:
“The money you claimed you sprayed at my party? You were seen putting it back into your car.”
She also accused Diiadem of repeatedly borrowing money from her and taking months to repay.
Diiadem acknowledged borrowing ₦1 million from Dabota on one occasion because she was in a meeting and could not make a transfer. But she said she later sent ₦1.5 million, adding extra money so Dabota could buy gifts for her daughter. Diiadem wrote:
“And yes, I borrowed N1 million from you because we were in a meeting and I couldn’t make a transfer at that moment. When I paid you back, I sent N1.5 million and even added extra so you could buy gifts for your daughter.
See proof.”
“Money na water, I don’t fake shit like you for clicks and accolades.”
Business, Funding and the Question of Jealousy
The women also accused each other of allowing business success to affect their friendship. Dabota alleged that Diiadem’s attitude changed after both women sought funding from the same finance company.
Dabota said Diiadem applied for $10,000, was unsuccessful and later watched Dabota complete the process and secure funding. According to Dabota, that was when she began noticing a clear change in Diiadem’s behaviour.
She also said the hostility became worse after she renovated and rebranded her business and showed Diiadem previews of new products.
Dabota alleged that she subsequently heard that Diiadem was telling people not to work with her.
Diiadem denied that she tried to stop Dabota’s business. She gave her own version of the funding story, saying she had been building her home and needed financial support. She said she approached Madam Moji’s company but refused when she was asked to use her car as collateral. She also claimed that she had carried Dabota along during the process.
But the larger argument was clear. Dabota saw jealousy while Diiadem saw hypocrisy and competition.
The Jarvis Opportunity
Their disagreement over Jarvis also exposed how differently the two women remembered their friendship.
Dabota claimed Diiadem initially refused to participate in a Jarvis interview because she did not want to be associated with it. She said she encouraged Diiadem to do it because it would expose her brand to a new audience.
Diiadem later gave a completely different account. She claimed Dabota wanted to be part of the opportunity and became upset when she was not invited.
Diiadem said Dabota had talked about how much visibility Soso gained through Peller and how useful it would be for Dabota and her daughter to attend.
Again, the disagreement was not simply about an interview. It was about access, opportunities and whether one woman was genuinely supporting the other’s growth.
The Married Ex Allegations
Then the fight moved into even more personal territory. Dabota referred to having helped Diiadem during a pregnancy involving what she called a “married boyfriend.”
Diiadem responded by saying that the story was not new. She then made her own accusation: that Dabota wanted access to the man. Diiadem alleged that Dabota remained in contact with her former partner and spent hours on the phone with him.
She also claimed Dabota came into her home and counted her stairs because she believed the man had built the house. Diiadem wrote:
“You simply couldn’t stand the fact that, despite every attempt to undermine me, I continued to keep my head high.”
She went on to raise other allegations about Dabota’s alleged interest in men connected to people around her.
Then the Bloggers Entered the Story
For Diiadem, one of the most serious parts of the fallout was not the accusations about relationships or money. It was what she said happened online.
She accused Dabota of feeding information to bloggers whenever they fell out. Diiadem specifically mentioned the “Big Church” saga and said Cutie Juls confirmed to her that Dabota had sent information about it.
She also claimed Dabota had done something similar with Sophia Momodu during RHOLagos.
According to Diiadem, the situation became particularly painful when her daughter’s image appeared on a blog. She wrote:
“I felt like a failed parent when I saw my daughter’s face on that dirty blog.”
She said she had to ask her brother to speak to Cutie Juls about removing her daughter’s pictures. Dabota challenged Diiadem to produce evidence and challenged the blogger to publish whatever evidence it claimed to have. She wrote:
“Speaking of Sophia: as I have already said, the boat was hired.
Whether it appeared on a blog or not, I said what I had to say directly to her face on national television, without mincing my words. We have since moved past that situation.
Speaking of the blogger, I dare you to publish the evidence supporting every allegation you have made. And to the blogger, please feel free to publish whatever evidence you claim exists as well. I would love to see it.
You have created a public impression about me, so now state your real grievance publicly and specifically.
Stop hiding behind stories about other people.”
“Tell the World Exactly What Dabota Lawson Did to You”
As the accusations multiplied, Dabota repeatedly returned to one question. She wanted Diiadem to stop discussing other people and say exactly what Dabota herself had done wrong. She wrote:
“SAY EXACTLY WHAT DABOTA LAWSON DID TO YOU.”
She repeated the demand several times. For Dabota, her own version was that she had supported Diiadem consistently.
She said she helped during Diiadem’s pregnancy, encouraged her to take opportunities, shared business contacts, encouraged her to participate in the Jarvis interview, helped her with an examination related to their faith and supported her birthday.
She also said she could “stand in front of anyone” and declare that the friendship was genuine.
Diiadem’s response was essentially that she had already explained why she walked away. For her, the problem was a pattern of feeling dismissed, hearing gossip and becoming uncomfortable with the way private matters were allegedly taken outside the friendship.
A Friendship That Once Looked Unbreakable
That is what makes the current fight so striking.
In January 2025, when RHOLagos Season 3 premiered, Diiadem and Dabota’s friendship was presented as one of the season’s bright spots.
By March, even as other housewives questioned Diiadem’s closeness to Dabota, the two remained closely associated.
Their friendship survived disagreements, public scrutiny and the pressures of reality television. But privately, according to their own messages, there were already repeated attempts to end it.
They reconciled, fell out again, reconciled again, and ventually, the private disagreements spilled onto social media.
What followed was no longer just about whether two friends had misunderstood each other.
It became a public battle over loyalty, money, business, relationships, access, bloggers and betrayal.
Where the Friendship Stands Now
Neither woman appears interested in returning to the friendship as it once was. Dabota’s message is one of defiance. She repeatedly challenged Diiadem to expose her and say exactly what she had done.
Diiadem, meanwhile, said she simply wanted to be left alone. She has argued that she had already tried to distance herself from the friendship and was pushed to speak because of what she described as continued attacks and stories about her.
In one of her later posts, she reflected on the situation and admitted that she blamed herself for getting into the mess. Yet she also said she had no regrets because every betrayal, setback and disappointment had taught her something.
For the two women who entered The Real Housewives of Lagos as apparent friends, their story has now become one of the show’s most complicated examples of how a friendship can move from public affection to private resentment and, eventually, a very public war.
And perhaps the biggest revelation from their latest exchange is that Churchill, money and the accusations now flying across social media may not have created the rift after all. They may simply have exposed how long the friendship had already been cracking.
