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Why It Is Time For That Painful Break Up

by Davies Ngere Ify
January 2, 2019
in Relationship
Reading Time: 3 mins read
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Bollywood movies are experts at showing viewers a guy and a girl using any means possible to find a way to be together — against all odds. The reason this is possible can be easily identified — They are in love. They are crazy about each other. They’d kill to be with themselves.

But that is how it should be in movies. Off the screen, our reality, love cannot always be enough to make a relationship work.

To be frank, the baggages that come with love are as intense at the feeling itself. I’ve seen people stay in unhealthy relationships, unhappy marriages, unfulfilling courtship, all in the name of “I love him.” or “My love for her is so strong.”

Don’t get me wrong, i’m not against it, being in love is an amazing experience, but we must know that the feeling alone is not the key to long—lasting and ever—sweet relationships. Here are some things that should tell you it might be time to end it with him or her:

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1. Not Getting What You Need

Every human being has something he or she wants in a relationship. These needs can be financial, emotional, social or functional. If one person feels the other isn’t doing enough to meet these requirements, it is best to talk about it. After the talk, if things remain the same, it might be time to move on. People tend to stay in relationships like this because of a certain tag society places on single people “especially if age is no longer on your side.” This is not as important as your happiness so it is best to do what is best for you, and not for what people will say.

2. Preferring Outsiders

When you achieve a target, or you get promoted at work, or you decided to finally share a secret with someone, who should be the first to know? Ideally, it should be your man/woman. If it is your colleague at work, a recent friend, your cousin or school daughter you open up to first then something is not right in your relationship. Seeking advice from outsiders or sharing a great news with people outside of your relationship is a clear sign that you should consider ending things once and for all.

You Might Also Want To Read: 5 Ways To Know You’re In A Temporary Relationship

3. Afraid To Ask For More

When you demand more from your partner, more in the sense of what you want or do not want in your relationship, you are on the right path. The world might say it makes you sound clingy or needy but there is absolutely nothing wrong with it. It is better than not speaking up and faking contentment just so you don’t lose him/her. That will only weigh you down physically and emotionally. Hiding your true feeling about your partner can only prolong what you are not happy about. It is better to say something and know where you stand. If possible, break up with him or her and save yourself years of misery in future.

4. Staying In It Because You Think You Have To

Some people are of the opinion that staying in a relationship that you have invested time and effort in makes a lot of sense. But investing more time and effort in a relationship that is one—sided will only delay the inevitable — A break—up. It is better you both go your seperate ways now that it is clear things are not working.

5. Not Liking Your Man/Woman

This might sound confusing but it is very possible. Experts say you can actually be in love with someone you don’t like. A relationship with this person can make you guys happy when the going is good, but experiencing difficult times together can be a very horrible experience. Couples will disagree, but those in cute, amazing relationships keep the mindset that no matter what, they are in it together. It might still be a daunting task to quit a relationship with someone you love but most times, if it is clearly not leading anywhere, it is better to think with your brain than your heart.

You Might Also Want To Read: 7 Things Men Really Really Want In A Relationship

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